Wednesday, May 26, 2010

big bullies

in life, we win some and we lose some.. we can't get the best of everything. that is an understood fact!

as the wife, when mr hubbies were hanging out at the mamaks with their friends, we were left with limited options.. we want to hang out with our girlfriends but need to sort the laundry first, get the sitter for the kids, make sure dinner is served.. and even when can managed all those, we still won't be in peace while hanging out - will be constantly looking at the watch to ensure we didn't exceed the untold curfews.

as the hubby, it may seems easy for us. we say no, and the wife must obey. we say now, it means now. we say ok, and that will be after few hours of negotiations. but, we are the breadwinner. we have to work. we must bring food to the table. we must pay the mortgages. we need to pay the bills. so what if our wives work, still, we need to give them money when the wifey asked for it. and we have to kiss ass to ensure our work is secured and that is not easy. some may need to be away from home for days and months for work.. imagine missing all those teeny weeny proud moments with the kids and the wifey.. not much choices left for us..we've been bullied too.

as the younger sisters and brothers, we receive instructions from the elders. to some extent we need to sacrifice their social life because we need to stay in coz nobody's home. we need to do the laundry. weclean the dishes. we do all the chores becuase the elders did those way before they were born. 

as the elder brothers and sisters,  we give constructive opinions. our opinions always been mistakenly identified as orders. we get constructive opinions from our parents too. we just delegate them to our siblings. sharing is caring, huh..

as an employee, we will always been bullied. we were paid to be bullied. we were bullied by the management, who keep saying we need to be proactive and take ownership. we stay in silence...but of course, we bully the system in our own way... remember, we should print that email in black and white, but it came out as in colours, with intention. we should be googling for technical info but been busy updating the blog and reading latest facebook status. we should call the customers and end up with chatting with our long lost friends...

that is how life is - it rotates. when we keep telling people our sob stories about how difficult life treated us as a person, we should remind ourselves how a big bully we could be when we were there.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

forever baby

i'm sure that all mums are so proud of their offsprings. i know i do. very proud of them.

it was aidan's teacher's day party this morning. it was a late notice from the school - i got it late evening yesterday..or maybe they did gave the letter the day before when aidan did not turn up for school. and i need to bring some food for the party too... agghh... being away from my aunt, who will always be the victim to cook for school stuff whenever the occasion arises, leave me not much choices. drove to the not-so-hyper-market, got myself the bulk nuggets and sausages ready to be cooked (and i woke up an hour early today!!!).. and nice photo frames for the teachers (not so much choices to choose from)...i wrapped the gifts and noticed that i forgot to buy the cards.. and so, i asked aidan to make four of them.. he wrote 'Thank you teacher, love Aidan'... and he pasted them on the gift.. and he decided to draw different pictures in front of the cards.. a jet for mrs lim, a stick for mrs ros, a balloon for ms lin and a car for mrs phary.. he can't write the teachers' names.. and i was the proud mother of his when he decided to code the card in such manners.... without me throwing the ideas to him... smart brain, huh?

aimar - always as charming as possible.. he may look so hyper, so active, running here and there. but he's always the favourite one. went for ayu's wedding over the weekend, but most of the girls laid eyes on him. he is so irressistable. and he teased a lot.. he can scold his grandma, rejecting her kissess and hugs, and on the next minute he can simply go to her and kiss her and ask her 'i want milk'.. now that he can talk, he talks non-stop. he was telling me nenek said that, abang dan said this and many more..another smart boy of mine..

raising a human being is not an easy task.. my bff called me up yesterday -  she had a teleconference with an eleven year old boy, giving him some piece of advise, and we wonder where his parents are. me, lately, still figuring out a good school for aidan for next two years..apparently, that is not as simple as i thought, and not cheap too.. my aunt still getting her high blood pressure attack thinking of the man her daughter picked (and this daughter of hers is 25!)... i guess, these kids of us will always be our babies, forever..  and those old nagging and sagging man and woman will always be our beloved parents... trust me, even with ten kids, i'm sure that we still need our parents.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

pleasure reading

an email came in my inbox yesterday.. the stupidest email i've ever received..among all others.. address to only myself, and sent by a senior sales manager in the company. and this was partially what he wrote:

As a front liner, meaning being a sales person you are the 1st line of contact with the customer. **** had placed the PO with PDR because he believes that you being a representative of the company, is able to provide the solutions & capable support to meet his plant / installations needs.

Sincerely I believe all sales personnel should be proactive and takes responsibilities in their course of their work for their actions. Every obstacle that one encounters, one will learnt from that.

In this case I would suggest that you take the initiative to contact **** & informed on the delivery status. Please do develop & take ownership.

ok, i may slipped out lots of details on how could this email can be so lame and stupid and the more i read it the angrier i could be.. but, it started with an order.. the order that we was supposed to lost in e-bid. a friend help ME out (yup, not the company, but ME, the sales person).. and before i blindly quote and over-pormised, i have verified with factory three times that they could deliver the valve within their promised date, and i even put four to six weeks buffer to ensure slipage in delivery has been accounted in. and still, when placing order, factory failed to meet the promised delivery, and the friend is jeopardizing his reputation for nothing... i called him, of course, few times.. keep apologizing to him...but as he said, all he wanted is the management to officially call and beg to differ and ask for a kind courtesy forgiveness... and what i did was to write to the management to officially reply to the customer.. at least they can plan their schedule for the foreseen delays in the delivery...

nope.. what i got was that stupid blardy reply. telling me to be proactive and take ownership... i was furious yesterday....but, at times writing this, i'm dazed, confused and a bit ticklish on how a stupid mind works... up to senior manager level.. o my, o my. i'm taking ownership to request help from my boss, and i was accused for not being proactive and didn't take ownership...

what the heck!

so, tell me something new?

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

experienced interviewee, anyone?

where do I belong
she've been blessed with smart brain.. no doubt. she've always been top three in the final exams. she represented the school for so many competitions. she performed well on stage. she wrote scripts for the school dramas. she was president of the clubs, the secretary of social soceities, the prefectorial and class-monitor board member. and she simply good, academically(.. of course, like all other geeks, she's so bad in sport!) she never have to try hard during exams.. and as she entered the university, she thought she still got the groove. of course she got it wrong.. all wrong.. she graduated fine, but, the result was not something that she proud of... but of course, she can still sell herself with the scroll from the UK!

it's hard being ambitious. she's been too comfortable getting all the ambitions fulfilled before. with not-something-she-can-be-proud-of degree, she knew getting employed by Fortune500 would not be an easy task (if she have nobody to practise cronism and nepotism). 

after five months of experience-less fresh graduate, she got a job. they called her in for a 'training engineer' position who supposed to be in charge of training materials, schedules, documentations bla bla bla.. something that she knew she can put up with. she went for the interview. the senior staff there already knew before she entered the room, they knew she will be hired. oversea's grad, 'free-hair', fresh, young.. that's all the boss care! another sad fact, but that was the truth. the hr called her up at midnight, telling her she got the job and will need to start immediately,and she didn't know that it would be peanuts!.. but it was great experience.. whenever she need to tell any interviewer her best career achievement, she would highlight her first job ..there's so many things that she've gone through, but the best things because she knew she was not alone.. her collegues and the boss was the best!

but, she couldn't help herself from being ambitious.. that was why she took up the offer to the "best employer in Asia yr 2000" company.. though the iraq, the navy, the SATU experiences were fun, yet, she changed the direction. she thought she'll be just fine working in a factory, as long as the name of the employer is well-known. she went to the interview. it was scary - two chinese senior engineers with one HR officer. she thought she won't get the job, but she did. well, it did not lasted long. after a year, she got a phone call, asking if she would be interested to join the oil & gas company based in KL.

she went for the interview. it was 'tough'. she didn't know what the interviewer was asking. she didn't know what the product the company deal with. but she convinced them that she can learn well and fast. somehow, she managed to charm the interviewer and he asked her to wait. she met the bald mat-salleh.. their MD. he was pleasant. he shook her hand, and asked "so, your fiance is working with Petronas?"....hmmm.. and she nodded naively. the MD asked her to wait - she roamed for two hours, and she came back for the offer letter...and fuhh.. who said interviews were difficult? at least, not to her.

after a while, she got bored. too many frustations and empty promises mounted. and she still the same, the ambitious her. she didn't understand how can somebody got a higher increment with bigger bonus and that was not her. and to add salt on the wound, there were no appraisal structures in place.. so, how did the evaluation done? .. and she is still wondering...

she did try her luck once a while. went for two interviews, did well and got the offers.. twice.. and she rejected them, twice.. one was because she didn't think that she was mentally prepared for a lady boss, and the other, she just did it for the sake of did it.. of course, the boss promoted her to become the senior.. else, might take a while for them to evaluate her, she thought.

and early this year, she started it again. she updated her CV and posted them. she got called. she went to three interviews.. the first one, she was lacking in process engineering and didn't get the post.. the only interview that she didn't get the job, as much as she could remember. the second one, they didn't hire them directly. they were contemplating. with her senior position to suit the junior post in the company, she was being put on hold. of course, they contacted her back after three months. she was told they were preparing the paperwork - may take a while as they need the HQ back in US to sign off. 

and while they are preparing, one of the Fortune500 company is preparing a letter for her too. it was supposed to be out last week. but, as there are bits and pieces that the HR need to sort internally, she still waiting for the letter. she was told the letter is ready, might be availabe for collection next week.. and she can't wait any longer.

the interview was the most interesting part. she's been trying to get call for an interview for the past seven months. she got an email only after seven months... was called for technical interview.. and she wondered how technical could it be..

the technical interview sucked big time. at least that was how she felt.. she never got nervous with interviews. she knew she can carry herself good. after going to her tenth year working, nothing technical is too technical.. but then, there were they. with one of the confident candidate. he was so confident that when she got a chance to ask him "how was it?"..this stranger told her "o my, i didn't realised i was there for more than an hour..".. and suddenly she knew there were more butterflies in her stomach than she ever had before... aggghhh... and, after forty minutes, she knew she might fail the technical assesment. it was not so technical as she've expected; she've been blabering about her technical experience bla bla when one of the interviewer asked her half and hour after that "what actually you do?".... darn!

and a week after, another email came in. it was too good to read the email that she passed the technical assesment and was due for structured interview.. she went for the structured interview.. very well 'structured' she may said. it was interesting. the assessors were tough. they said there were no wrong or right answers..but, they were looking for the best answers, to ensure best candidates were selected.  she was given a case study. a reading about "side effect of science".. she started by telling her opinion.. a genuine one.. and they started throwing questions.. what if you were the PM? what if i was Karpal Singh? what if Obama said no?what if, what if, what if.. she was mentally exhausted. then, they asked her to tell them what did she do when there were work crisis, how she handled issues, what she did to get things through.. and without her realizing, it took them two hours before they could released her. she didn't know what to feel after she completed the interview. there were no wrong or right answers, and she didn't know whether she did well or not. 

she did not have to wait long. a phone call the day after giving a hint that she was recommended for a position.. and she thanked Allah for the blessings. 

she still waiting though. the official letter is yet to come. should be on her table by next week, InsyaAllah.. but, she knew, there'll always some possibility that things didn't work out as planned. so, she'll wait and keep on praying. 

she just can't wait any longer.  

p/s: the structured interview - they rate her 1 for empathy (very 'hostile') and 4 for creative solution... hmmm.. a lady boss anyone?

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

spoilt or blessed?

what is it with the rich clans? and when i say rich - i meant super duper rich who bought a white cooper last month and bought another one yesterday in yellow.. and nope, the white one still there in the garage.
i'm not rich. sometime, i led people to believe that way. when the idiot (i hate so much now) been sacarstically told me "you ok la.. US Dollars" (which he still believe that my hubby is earning in USD, despite the fact), i just ignore him. but i am not rich. i'm a proud owner of platinum credit card, just because..

i met one rich guy yesterday. his aura so strong that i nearly bow at him. he talked smoothly like a waterfall, and the way he put his sentences speaks for itself. he hang out at Starbuck and played golf. 
i met my friend from college last few weeks.they are both rich and were blessed with beautiful kids. these kids are so 'blessed' that the rich looks showed in their faces.. so rich.
i met one dato seri. he, no doubt is rich. but he's rotten rich. he was telling everybody how he can survive even if he's not getting any sales today.. he speaks highly of himself. and people surrounding him speaks highly to him.. and it is annoying.
i met my bff when she told me her daughter went to this bday party, and she was just at the entrance and saw this garage full of cars, and half of them were covererd.. she counted, there were ten luxury cars..

so what is it with the rich clan? some of them is just ok. they remember where their roots come from. but most of them keep forgetting. and when they forgot, they become so arrogant that we just wish their worst ever death.  

Friday, May 14, 2010

tick tock tick tock

i think i write better when i am mad.. at least, i know i need to vent out my anger, and this would be the perfect venting place i have.. the good thing about having a blog.. and nope - i don't give a damn what people want to say, comment or think about me. this is purely mine, genuinely my own feelings and emotions, and have got nothing to do with anybody else, and i have all the rights in the world to think, say and believe what i want to think, say and believe.. so if you readers out there really think you need to drop me the comment, please do so..and of course you can save my write up, in case i decided to pull the post some other time...but, bear in mind, i'm the one who will approve the comments... so, be my guest.

as i'm posting this, i'm like a timebomb.. tick tock tick tock.. waiting to be explode.


ok, that posting was in my draft page since last wednesday. i've cooled down. not because i've took care of the idiot that had made me pissed off, .. just because i realized (nope, my bffs made me realized) that there's no point me wasting my time and energy, especially i'm quite sure that i won't be dealing with him in the near future..

but he is so full of shit that i need to gather all my strength to control my hatred whenever he dumped me his bossy, perasan bagus attitude.... the power of having heartless, rude, stupid mind.... and to compliment that, authorities come along.. hmmm


as i'm writing this now, the clock is still ticking.. and i'm still waiting.. and as Allah is the Owner of what will come, i still am praying hard that the rezeki allocated will still be mine.. just a matter of time.. and i just hope that i have the courage to wait a little bit longer.. just when the time comes and i can proudly throw all the garbage back to them.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

just a normal wednesday

it's either the day of the month is coming, or just the weather. i'm feeling not so good today. got so many things piled up on the desk. got a 10 o'clock appointment later. got a 'sacarstic' phone call early morn... arrrgghhh... not a good start.. and it's the middle of the week. another arrggghhhh...
a good simple write-up will do some good, i hope.

for the first time, i'm allowing my dear aimar to follow my cousin off to kl later. aidan will need to wait, if not tomorrow, we'll be driving up the day after. this would be my first time. though it won't be long till we meet again. though it will only be a three-hours-away. though he'll be safe and sound with my own parents. i knew i miss him already. i've been having more than second thoughts to allow him to follow my cousin.. this morning, when i asked him if he wanted to stay with me or follow his auntie, he opted for his auntie.. only a few seconds before i made my move (which happened to has one minor obstacle as the key broke, and i started to feel not good about it), aimar told me he wanted to stay. but, my cousin persuaded him, and he agreed.

aidan, on the other hand, told his brother that he can't follow his aunt. instead, he (aidan) supposed to come along. of course i said no. he's been missing classess quite a lot as mama needs to be here and there.going to school is no more in his priority list, and his mama is to be blame. i really need to settle down so that he can take his school seriously. his teacher said he picked things up fast though he's been missing school. but, he still can't do addition more than ten, he still need to learn how to read, fast and fluently. he still need to go to school. he gave me this "i'm not okay" face this morning. he wanted to follow his brother, and he knew he just couldn't!

ooppsss.. time to go. my ten o'clock appointment will be in half hour time. need to make my move now.   

Monday, May 10, 2010

the 'adam' in a man

i don't watch malay drama/movie (denials!!!)... not because they are in malay, but i've seen more real drama surroundings that i don't see the need of watching less than real drama on tv. anyhow, the previlige of working not in the city means i could be home on-time and have few extra minutes at home, lazy-ing around, comfortably dump myself on the sofa, changing the channels and lately i got hooked up with this tele-drama "adamaya".
nope - i'm not going to write a review about the tele-drama.. afterall an anonymous throll wrote to me "it's just your side of story".. which, i want to express it here, of course it is just one side story, my story.. it's my blog you stupid bugger! (and yes, you can leave anonymous comment and swear at me zillions time, and i still got the final say, you moron!).. back to this tele-drama.. i want to write about the adam...

physically, adam is not the most handsome guy i would think of. he has the look and he's ok. he was asked to marry maya, a stranger, a girl she never knew who was madly in love with dani. for some reason, he went on with the marriage, was blessed with a beautiful smart daughter and after five years, dani came back into maya's life, and maya was smitten by her first love. i don't know how would the story ends, but i bet it would be like the fairy tales (and this would be one of the reason i don't watch malay dramas.. they are so predictable).

adam, always there for his wife. there was a scene where his wife were caught khalwat (close proximity) with her ex, and what he did as her husband was, he drove to the crime scene, asked permission to the officer to bring her wife back, and grabbed his wife's hand with no further comment... i can't imagine what my hubby would do to me if that happen to us.. and i don't think i have to.. it won't happen, insyaallah.
adam, hopelessly romantic. he knew his wife was in love with other guy. he took advantage as a husband, sending off his wife, and kiss her forehead.. and i bet all the girls that were watching the moment were like 'oohhh..ahhhh'.. i knew i got goosebumped!

adam, the loving father. he made-believe that the daughter in the drama is his real-life daughter by blood. they were so close and the kid was so attached to him.. they really clicked like what the characters supposed to... and he reminded me of how envious i was when my boys would definitely choose their dad over mama, because aboh is the fun one!

adam, the soft-spoken guy. i felt like slapping his wife whenever she said something to adam. not that adam is the weak link and as we would say 'dayus'.. he's a real gentleman. he says things that supposed to be said, and he says it 'cooly'. that wife of him really needs to meet real men out there who would only know say "hmm" instead of 'yes' or 'no'.

adam, too good to be true... the wife back home is driving him insane. and there was this young sweet beatiful lady,lisa, who is head over heel with him.. and yet, and yet, he didn't see that. lisa admitted that she likes adam. and adam keeps telling himself that he's married ..

i guess all the ladies out there would agree with me that this adam is nothing but a character nicely created for us to enjoy the drama. at least, that works for me. though it will definitely be impossible that he ever exists, i still be thankful for having the opportunity to meet my 'adam', the man i married.  he's not perfect, but perfect enough for this less than perfect woman.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

the Jakarta fling

i'm trying to capture every second spent over the hen's weekend, but within the forty-eight hours, there's so many things to talk about. it was fun, great, wonderful weekend. ok, my throat did kill me a while, but, we had fun.

the journey started with the bride-to-be (btb) was worried when fifteen minutes before departure, there was still no sign of her lawyer friend.. but she made it, and there were four of us: the btb, the lawyer, the coordinator and the mother who left her kids to celebrate the hen's weekend..
the itinerary: spa, shopping, shopping, clubs, shopping and bring back the wedding goodies. simple and straight forward, and frankly, tied up eventful weekend for 48 hours.
the hotel:a little scary.. shabby and smelly.. the coordinator text us not to forget to bring our swimming gears, if we got time to lie down by the pool... if and only if there were pool.. the btb had googled the hotel, but managed not to tell us that the review was nothing but thumbs down.. and when we found the hotel towel could hardly cover our body, we must agree with the review. hei, but we hardly spent time in the hotel, and they have connected room. the shower was fine, and they have bath tub!.. and the lawyer so much in love with the guy in the picture hanged by the aisle.. yup, the floor was decorated with pictures of muscular men and ladies in bikinis.. don't ask us why as we are still wondering..
the food: we love the nasi padang lunch we had. it was good, full of taste and so damn cheap.. my throat was killing me after that, so, didn't really remember how was other food taste like.. but, it was not bad.. it was nice, fulfilling and cheap. 
the spa: was great.. at least, i personally, like it.. need the rest and peace..
the saloon: they blow dry my hair and i look so va va voom.. to bad, it lasted just for few hours..
the mangga dua: shopped for the boys in one of the shop. the btb managed to get the 650pcs goodies, and we took the cab to go back to the hotel. 
the chempaka mas: o my, o my.. i din buy much textiles..but, it was great fun spending time chooisng the textiles and fabrics, with nice colours for the dress, baju kurung and many more.. we did ok with the shopping.
the taxi: we got cheated when we decided not to take up the blue bird taxi service. it was taxiku company.. people. if you decided to go to jakarta, don't bother taking any other taxi besides blue bird or silver bird taxi service.. except the btb, all three of us dozed off once we were comfortably seated at the backseat. i woke up to realise it was a long trip..and the btb, who was fully awake told us the drive took the long way instead.. we wanted to swear.. we wanted to scold.. but we were nowhere near our home country, and we were all sweet classy girls.. we don't think it is wise to take any risk but to pay up the taxi drive twice as much as we supposed to.
the tanah abang: the have lots and lots of shops... if and only if we got the extra few days to spend our time browsing and looking for the greatest deal..
the bajaj:..ha, this was the interesting part..we got half hour to reach our supposedly 6-hours spa appointment.. excluding the 'macep', we were just in time.. we walked away from the tanah abang complex, to get the right taxi so that we reached the spa safely, timely and without being cheated... we end up with a bajaj.. a tricycle that barely fit the three of us at the back, and the lawyer settled with having close intamacy by seating next to the driver.. i bet the driver could hardly concentrate.. and the lawyer friend was telling us the driver has a nice pinkish lips..hmmm.....but it was great 'adventurous' experience...
the clubs: the one we went at rits carlton..hmm.. we can't comment much.. we felt so yound with all these old-age people surrounding.. we should have known when a friend recommended us that place.. she's not getting any younger be it.. the other night, we were supposed to go to this clubhouse 'dragonfly'.. supposedly one of the famous one that the event coordinator insisted on going...we reached the club, but it was closed.. apparently, the club was having a private function elsewhere..and the coordinator was just not meant to go there.. we went to the next club.. after few rounds trying to figure out the entrance, we reached the club.. with the new heels i bought from tanah abang..which broke after few hours withstanding my weight and my dancing..kot.. it was ok. there were so many youngsters, we felt out of place.. but, we sure know how to fit in. the btb was wearing this sign "bride-to-be" .. guys been congratulating her.. the lawyer attracted few wierd guys..but what the heck.. at least, she got some.. me, being the loyal wife, stand by the btb, watching people... and of course we noticed this one guy.. the most handsome on the floor.. he was.. and as we were there standing, there were four girls came up to him, trying to have a decent conversation with him.. he was so handsome and we are all already in love with him.. and i don't remember how and when, but i vividly remember how excited me and the btb when we saw he started chatting up with the coordinator.. he was smiling, showing off his cute dimple.. he touched her, he looked into her eyes.. and he pulled her to the dancefloor..and he was there, until we got our taxi back to the hotel.. our coordinator friend was smitten by him, and we, the good girlfriends, were so proud of her.. we helped her imagining her fairy tales, we that night, oopss, morning... we still smiling when we sleep as we were so happy for them.. as i'm posting this, they are still on bbm (the blackberry messengers).. we really hope and pray things worked out well between them.. so that we'll have the next hen's weekend for her next year... but, if it doesn't, this girlfriend of mine should feel nothing but great.. of all the girls that approached this dutch guy, he picked her.. just because... 

and i was telling my bff, the btb, i've forgotten the last time i felt so smitten over somebody.. of course i meant my hubby.. not that we are not in love anymore.. we are..we still are.. especially when he's not around, i always want him to come back.. but, the tingling sensation meeting someone new, and madly adoring every moves he made, laugh at his every remarks, found that he is so irressitable every seconds.. you know what i mean... that get-to-know phase is way beyond my reacheable requirement.. i love what i have with my hubby, but, remembering the first few dates we had, always the best..

now that we are married, with kids of our own, with work on the table, with house chores, with everything.. we hardly could find time to flirt with our significant others.. i need to work that out...