Friday, April 16, 2010

taboo topic

disclaimer: these posting got nothing to do with anybody healthily alive neither nor.. hahaha.. as if..

they've been together for so long, way before the ice age, and he said he loves her. she found out he was cheating, ticked her off, but they worked things out. he said sorry, promise not to repeat it again and he's forgiven. of course, she can't trust him then. maybe, just maybe, he tried to learn to be loyal.and of course, she has to learn to start trusting him. 
and then, wham!bam! he's up and running again.. liar liar pants on fire.. things he said he repented and won't repeat it again as if never been said.. he's being a typical man!
she had enough. she wanted to talk things through. she wanted his reassurance. he said if she can't accept the way he is, her loss. and her friend told her that she doesn't have to get stuck with bastard like him. how can she even breath with the same air when he's sleeping around like a stray dog? but she said 'what about the kids?'what about the kids?

she never enjoys sex. whenever,whatever, she will try to resist. and then, he would veto her resistant. he would say she was sinning. she've done a lot of sins, as if she cares so much of another sin.. but she goes with the flow. she just too sleepy to argue.

sex is ok with her. she never have to ask. the request never overbearing. (i'm grabbing for next sentence to complete the scenario.. and i give up..) 

a passer-by passed them.he prompted the question "do you know who she was?". it was not the question that annoyed her. it was his face. the wide grin up to the ears, the shiny bright eyes, the tonation, the body language.. it's all there, on his face. she's not local. of course she hardly knew anybody. and he just couldn't wait for her to reply. he answered immediately "that was my ex"... and she obviously pissed off when she couldn't control her steady-state 'as if i care' face , coz she cares!.. from her back, his ex looks good. and that is not good..especially when he stop complimenting her, he called just to tell her she was fat, and after she told him that the menses has stop, sex is still not in the picture. nope! nada! he must have hate her for being fat.

she was sleeping, and he was wanking next to her.. no wonder she left him. she doesn't want it, and he can help himself.  

they enjoy sex.. and we think because they are not married. the one and only reason.

i posted a blog on sex education, with a nice catchy title "let's talk about sex" .. and realised that my visitors of that day was higher than usual.. am sure there's so many pervs back then that goggled and got upset as there were just the cookies monster photo instead of pornstar pictures.

we were discussing - for the sake of discussing (as we've done enough gossiping): when will human being stop wanting sex? but then, as i did some rethinking, when will women start wanting sex and when will men stop wanting it?.. i wonder..
our shrink friend told us, sex is supposed to be a two-way communication.. when two person madly deeply in love, they will both work things out to make it interesting enough that the question of when we stop wanting it shouldn't be a question. she partly right. as another part, we are still figuring out.


Thursday, April 15, 2010

mind could do miracle

imagine this:

- having a debt-free account, no credit cards monthly instalment
- no need to wake up every workday, just because you need to earn that monthly income
- got to wake up at eleven a.m. everyday (sometimes may be up to 2pm), and good food is readily served on the dining table 
- no need to deal with those idiots, ass-kissers, back-stabbers in the office
- no need to defend anybody, just because
- after shower, walk straight to that walk-in closets, full of haute coutures of designers who you could hardly pronouce their name
- match the dress with fashionable Ferragamo / Gucci / Chloe / Tods and matching stilletos
- the red ferrari at the driveway waiting for that high speed stroll on our own jam-free, bump-less, toll-free highway
- a huge bouquet of wild flowers with teddy and box of chocolate deliver right to your door, from your loved ones, for no reason.. just because he loves you
- set for the appointment at the spa, tip top full head to toe treatment, not worrying on the time and the charges
- spend all the money at those close-for-your-eyes only boutiques.. and nobody asking for justification if why you buy what you've bought...
- taking your own sweet time to fulfill your sweet tooth of great desert bar, without concerning on your flabby tummy
- blessed with well behave, obidient, smart genius kids of your own
- you could just take that private jet of yours, with your bffs, just to check-out the latest Cartier watch collection in Paris

gosh.. i got so many things to write about, and my adrenalin boost so high that i can't stop my imagination running wild.. i'm sure there's a lot more that we can imagine..

but for now,
i will settle with not reporting directly to idiot!do pray for my imagination to become reality.. for now..

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

jewels in one's life

life is all about self-discovery..and i'm thankful

she speaks her mind out. she says it out loud. she blurts out words beyond thinking. she shows it when things do not sync with what she thinks is right. at least, that is who she thinks she is.

then, her bffs, two of them, sitting in front of her.. condemning her acts.. she started first.. she questioned  how could a person won't bother attending a brief farewell lunch just because... putting up a one hour fake smile, trying to convince she appreciated the friendship and lectures..  won't harm anybody, right? right? and that ignites the dynamite.. her bffs were telling her how fake she and she is.. she loathes that shallow-minded kampung girl and her guts, and yet, she smiles in front of her. she cried for hating the decision made, and yet, she laugh out loud when what she meant was to confront and said i hate the decision. and when she thinks back, yes, she is so fake. when she said that two-faced, hypocrite con lady..she meant it for herself. at her age, she doesn't have to pretend.. she doesn't have to care what people thinks about her.. she doesn't have to put the act just to let the people smile.. alas, she's not eyeing for any good-heart-good-person award, so, she really doesn't have to.. and maybe, just maybe, she prefers not to have a lot of friends, good best friends. among them, she doesn't have to lace her sweet remarks with ingeniune smile. she meant it when she compliments them, and of course she teases them, pull their legs and she knows her friends were okay with the jokes.. prinicipally, she shouldn't act the way she behaves.. but guess it would be too hard to mold her at her age now. 

though it is countable, she knew her friends know her best. she is grateful to have friends like them. she cries like a crazy woman and the next seconds she starts mocking her friends's responds.. she screams at the top of her lung how much she hates that bitch and in a blink of the eye she bought her gifts.. her friends know her too well to take her seriously, but they do.. at least that they show her they still care.. and she loves every bits of that friendship.. she cherishes them in every way.. no matter where she goes, no matter what she does, no matter who she is.. these few friends of hers are true friends.. she hates that person, they loathe them even more; she complains about the pain she's in, they hurt even worst; she yells for revenge, they scream louder; she speaks in german, they respond in french, and they still laugh for the jokes together..

she doesn't want to lose them; the friendship they've built. they are the jewels in her life, and she thanks them.. when all surrounds demand for her fake compliments, the jewels she has left just take her for what she is.. and how can she not be thankful?