Sabar mama abah

Just talked to Abah.. usually, I would join them for breakfast.. only that I was so soaked up with things on my laptop that I realized it was 11 and they were all done with breakfast, Alhamdulillah. 

Nope, I am not noble and I am ashamed to admit that. Tiap-tiap doa, mesti nak doa jadi baik, mintak Allah tolong.. 

Pelikkan kita ni? Kita tahu kita tak baik, dok buat dosa memanjang... hatta, walau dah tahu pun masih bermaksiat... Astaghfirullah

Sebab memang kita dicipta nak jadi hamba Allah- sentiasa rujuk, memohon ampun, meminta rahmat dan barakahNya, berharap dan gentar pada pahala dan dosa yang kita lakukan.. moga setiap amal soleh kita diterima di hari pembalasan nanti. 

...

Back to cerita abah, mama...

I've been unfair and 'hard' to them... astaghfirullah.... lepas kejadian salah faham ngan Yeen, I always wander why they never bother to help to rekindle the severe relationship we had - only to realize, I'm a parent too... I know, if Aidan and Aimar and Aivey had a fight, sooner or later, they would go back to each other... and I've been warning them constantly and consistently... "salah faham mana pun awak bertiga, never severe your relationship, bukan sebab mama aboh, tapi, sebab lillahita'ala..please help us by saving us and yourself from the hellfire. Jangan buat benda yang Allah dah warning ulang kali!"

I guess, that's how abah & mama position - they are not taking side, though I'd still think they love yeen more..hahahaha... alhamdulillah.

I'm a wild child, hard-headed and never wanted to listen to them as much... amppppuuuuunnnn mama, abah!

As I was reading the book about surah Yusuf ni, I stumbled upon the takeaway from the verse no 18...

Ayat pujuk diri... ayat nak suruh sabar...Yusuf 12:18

وَجَآءُو عَلَىٰ قَمِيصِهِۦ بِدَمٖ كَذِبٖۚ قَالَ بَلۡ سَوَّلَتۡ لَكُمۡ أَنفُسُكُمۡ أَمۡرٗاۖ فَصَبۡرٞ جَمِيلٞۖ وَٱللَّهُ ٱلۡمُسۡتَعَانُ عَلَىٰ مَا تَصِفُونَ

They brought his shirt, stained with false blood. He said, “Nay; rather your souls have enticed you to commit something. But I will bear it with beautiful patience. It is Allah’s help that I seek against what you claim.” 

Dan (bagi mengesahkan dakwaan itu) mereka pula melumurkan baju Yusuf dengan darah palsu. Bapa mereka berkata: “Tidak! Bahkan nafsu kamu memperelokkan kepada kamu suatu perkara (yang tidak diterima akal). Kalau demikian, bersabarlah aku dengan sebaik-baiknya, dan Allah jualah yang dipohonkan pertolonganNya, mengenai apa yang kamu katakan itu.”

I'm not sure I would be as calm as that if I'm in Nabi Ya'kub position - obviously dah nampak comel molek je t-shirt yang kekonon ada darah tu tak koyak bagai.. cuba imagine kalau betul diorang amik T-shirt tu sambil struggle dok lawan serigali..confirm2 lah koyak-rabak bagai... tapi, not this one!

Tu sebab kena ajar kat anak-anak, takyah lah nak menipu.. especially ngan mama aboh... mesti kantoi punye!... 

And menipu ni is very ugly, to some extent.. bila menipu sekali mesti terpaksa menipu lagi dan lagi... Allahuakbar, dah jadi dosa jariah pulak, wa nauzubilah!

So, back to citer Nabi Ya'kub ni, he knew for certain that a wolf do not eat Yusuf... sebab dia yakin dengan mimpi nabi Yusuf yang akan diangkat jadi nabi... dia yakin dengan janji Allah... 

Kita tak pernah tahu apa akan jadi di masa depan, kita doa bebanyak, kalau buruk mintak jauhkan..kalau elok, mintak mudahkan. 

Kerja kita, usaha, tawakkal dan yakin doa pada Allah mintak bantuan selari dengan jadi hambaNya yang taat. 

Masa anak-anak dia bawak balik baju berdarah, bagitau bapak diorang yang Yusuf kena baham dek serigala... apa nabi Yaakub cakap?

فَصَبۡرٞ جَمِيلٞۖ

Beautiful patience is more fitting - seindah-indah sabar jadi penawar!

Mashaallah.. kuatnya iman! Ya Allah, beri aku kesabaran yang indah itu atas setiap ujian yang Engkau qadarkan pada ku, Ameen. 

That was and always be my prayers and I am certain Allah will always give the best!

Nabi Yaakub tak marah bebel kat anak-anak dia. Masa gaduh dengan Yeen dulu, Abah tinggi suara sikit sebab anak sulung dia ni sungguh tak beradab datang rumah dia nak jerit-jerit... I can totally empathise to his reaction at that time..But most of the time, abah, just like mama, will not say a word... diorang malas nak campur, sampailah ke hari ni... pernah dua tiga kali, I asked them why are they not helping to solve the issue between me and yeen, and abah shut me off right away, and so did mama... tahu dah they would respond like that, tapi, biasalah..anak sulung diorang ni memang jenis ketegag sikit..hahaha

Nabi Yaakub knew that Yusuf was alive, but he did not rush to search for him for he knew that Allah would guard Yusuf. Lagipun, Nabi Yaakub takmo expose the crime his other sons did - 

Sebab bila sorang anak buat salah to another, the parent suffers great distress [either way]. Their heart burn for the wronged child if he does not avenge her, and his heart burns for the other child if he exacts vengeance agains her...

Allahuakbar - what have I done????

Mama, abah, I'm a parent too... and I know how distress it could be bila anak bergaduh... and I can never put my position in your position, bila anak dah tua-tua, tak seteru, masing2 ikut kepala masing2, macam budak2....

Amppuuuuunnnnnn mama abah. 

May Allah reward mama abah a beautiful special palace in Jannatul Firdaus bighoiri hisab. allahumma ameen. 

Oh, one beautiful thing I learned from the verse 18 besides beautiful patience is ٱللَّهُ ٱلۡمُسۡتَعَانُ, indeed, we would always need help from Allah and so, ask Him and He will help!ameen..